Meet Maëlys Le Levreur, founder of My Little Coaching
From Montessori to crèche
When we hear the word "coach", we sometimes get scared. "I can understand, because this expression didn't exist 12 years ago, when I chose it. Today, it's used indiscriminately. I prefer the term accompagnant ". Maëlys tells us about her journey from specialized studies to the discovery of Montessori pedagogy:"Initially, Montessori schools were establishments in poor suburbs in Italy. "
The pedagogy initiated by Maria Montessori consists in observing children and proposing activities according to their development and desires, because every child is different. We set up workshops to help them become autonomous and do things on their own.
Before founding My Little CoachingMaëlys was a nursery manager in Paris. Three weeks before the famous Covid, which no one could have foreseen, she decided to concentrate full-time on her coaching project. "I created it for parents who didn't have a place in a crèche.
The miracle recipe doesn't exist
Today, Maëlys works with companies and individuals, with a strong message: there is no miracle recipe, because every child is unique. "I'm not here to judge, I'm not going to tell parents whether their methods are good or bad."But what do you do when you're overwhelmed and need help?
According to Maëlys, you have to observe, listen to your child and learn as you go along, while breaking away from preconceived ideas. "I bought every parenting book imaginable. What bothered me was this injunction to perfect parenting, which leaves parents at a loss. This famous parental doubt that creeps into life can be quite sneaky, especially when you look at all those perfect parents on Instagram. It's normal to have doubts, but the little one needs a parent to accompany him or her. I think parents should trust each other. They're already the experts on their own child, not the books." The educator continues her reasoning: "Before, when we wanted to plant a fruit tree, we asked our grandfather. Now, we ask our grandfather, our friends, youtube, Instagram and we end up doubting. "
Far from being anti-social networking or against parenting books, she advocates getting to know your own child, so as to adapt to his or her needs... Without forgetting yourself, the parent. "In the end, we talk a lot about the child and little about the parent. With the arrival of Covid, many adults think that they need to be even more involved with their children. The family was almost all that was left during this period. And yet, forcing yourself to play when you don't feel like it won't be a quality moment for either of you."
Trust and learning
Faced with these reassuring words, Maëlys explains that she has conceived her book as a practical compendium to accompany future and young parents in their role. The woman suspected of whispering in families' ears confides that she understands children better than adults. In her book, she explains things in concrete terms and draws parallels : "If you were ordered to go to your room, how would you react?" She also unpacks what goes on in our children's heads. "When we tell them not to do such and such, they understand the opposite" and for each problematic situation, she offers keys to try out, advice from useful books or websites.
Help, Maëlys!
Post-partum, sleep, tantrums... Maëlys talked to us about the questions she is most often asked.
How can I lighten my post-partum routine?
Once you've made room for your baby in your body, you need to make room for him in your life, and in that of your family. It's only natural that this should take time! First and foremost, you need to accept, without feeling guilty, that there will be a period of trial and error as you get to know your child. This can take anywhere from a few weeks to a few years.
When will my baby sleep through the night?
"The question doesn't really arise until the child is 8 months old. You need to know a few things, like the circadian cycle (the difference between day and night). It sets in around 4 months, so you have to be patient! Sleeping through the night is a myth and... an exception. On the other hand, it's important to establish rituals for children, such as bedtime stories. We adults have our rituals too! Children and babies often need a period of decompression."
How do you deal with tantrums?
"When they're angry, children are in an emotional state that overwhelms them, and if you put them in their room, they won't be able to move on... and sometimes they can. Some children need time alone, or arms, and that's when you have to find the right solution for them. When he's in the throes of emotion, the child can't hear us. You have to test and find what suits your child."
How do you prepare for the arrival of your second child?
"When we adults know we're expecting a new child, we're overwhelmed with emotions. It's the same for our children. And then, once the baby's here, the grown-up finds himself doing things that weren't asked of him before... He no longer has the exclusivity of his parents, whereas before, he had his arms all to himself. And on the parent's side, we feel like we have to apologize and compensate with gifts, but it's our adult decision to make. You have to explain what a family is right from the start. In the beginning, there's a bubble of love formed by the two parents. Then they decide to enlarge it with a first child. And then the parents love each other so much that they want to create an even bigger bubble. You have to explain to the first child why you love him or her. We love our children because they're different, and we love them throughout their lives. It's important not to create competition."
Join us on Instagram for our LIVE interview with Maëlys on the exciting topic of post partum !